The New Me

If I told you that my husband, Jeff, was my 13th boyfriend, you probably won’t believe me. He was, by the way. I grew up a very insecure teenager, having practically absentee parents who I never got to have a real relationship with. They barely knew the person that I turned out to be. If they were not extremely busy with their respective jobs, they were busy dealing with major issues and fighting each other. Needless to say, I came from a very dysfunctional family.  This drove me to look for love, as they say, “in all the wrong places.”

I never planned to enter the dating scene like I did back in college. This really is a long story to tell, allow me to just mention the highlights. It came to a point that I had three boyfriends at one time! It was like the wall of protection that I erected between me and the boyfriends. A wall of defense that I thought will prohibit me to be emotionally attached to any of them. But who was I kidding, right? I told myself that there was no way I was ever going to experience any of the heartaches my mom have had ever since I can remember and even the years before I was ever designed to remember anything yet.  It was in 1997 when I made a 180 degree turn and chose to forgive my parents and all the imperfections of my family that drove me to make the wrong choices.

100% happier

Before my transformation, I was an emotional black hole.  The new me that started some 12 years ago is now 100% happier. 

I knew I was completely missing the mark and I had to make a decision to go back to my first love – God. I don’t mean to sound preachy but it’s really just that. I saw that no matter how intentional I was to try to fix my life, my way, there was just no other way I could ever be truly happy. Ever since that day that I have surrendered my life back to God’s disposal, He has used even the not so good things in my past, for His glory. (Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! 2 Cor. 5:17) He brought about a change in my life and passion towards reaching out to the youth and even married couples.   Something that I never would have thought at all possible.  

God is so amazing!

Building relationships with the youth, listening to their needs and challenging them to live beyond the mediocrity of our times are the things that I have been doing this past 12 years, as I partner with my husband who currently pastors a church in Makati.  Whatever issues I had in the past somehow gave me the credibility to know what the young people are going through and this allowed me to minister to their hearts.  Seeing them soar in victory after all those times of teaching gives me more than just a sense of fulfillment.  Knowing that they did not have to go through the same path I did as they maximize their youth and seeing them go through life as victorious individuals is  simply priceless. And this new me will press on, knowing in my heart that it is what I’m called to do.    

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